The confessions of a fitness instructor, who can no longer be a fitness instructor

Some of you will have seen my recent post about cancelling ALL my classes and wonder why!

Some of you will know and some of you will speculate as to the why?

I find myself in an overwhelming emotional state that I can only share with you if I take you back to lockdown 2020. Like most I turned to what I could control and I took my business online. Virtual bootcamps, virtual yoga classes, pilates, meditation. You named it I did it and I loved the community of men and women that I had. These people joined me week after week for some freedom, support, an outlet for all the emotions that came with COVID, self-isolation and being stuck in doors and out of control.

After a few months I developed a lump on my groin. After some investigation and appointments, it was determined that I had an inguinal hernia; a bulge that occurs in your groin region, the area between the lower part of your abdomen and your thigh. Inguinal hernias occur because of a weakening of the muscles in the lower abdomen. Three layers protect the intestines inside the lower abdomen. Not life threatening or painful ..so I was informed but the more and more I trained and focused on my business the more painful it got. The pain would be anywhere from a seriously painful PMS to an unbeareable stabbing pain.

All classes and personal exercise was put on hold and I was told that I would be able to have surgery to control the pain and cover the hernia. But until then I would have to wait, no exercise, no lifting heavy weights which included my 2 year old daughter.

In March 2021, the day came and I had my operation. The recovery was excruciating, the day I got home was the worst I've ever felt (and I've had 2 children) But, I rested and recovered like I was told. I did everything by the book in the hopes that my life would go back to normal.

The day finally came in August 2021 when I returned to my love my passions, my meaning in life. I had spent so much of my time learning new skills, new ways to train and understanding the mental side of things and my learning didn't stop there. During the next 10 months I built up not only adult classes, children yoga, teaching in nurseries, schools, pre and post-natal yoga. It was finally time for my business to take off and I was loving every minute of it.

The feedback from every single person that attended my classes was absolutely amazing. I was fulfilling my dream and I could not have been happier. Don't get me wrong it's a hard industry the time spent marketing, prepping classes, zoom, Spotify playlists..... the list goes on but I wouldn't have changed it for the world.

Which bring us to Sunday 1st May 2022. A children's rugby tournament would you believe it. (Those of you that know me, know I have Arizona 3 and Fintan 10). Both of which were in attendance to the Rugby festival. An amazing sunny day and lots of wins and fun.

There was no click, no pull, no strain but just a slow increase of excruciating pain. It felt like the inside of my groin was falling down and the weight was horrific. At 5am the next morning I could take it no more. I rang 111 and was advised to go to A+E. After a few strong painkillers, a scan and 3 surgeons later. I had developed another Hernia!

That brings us to today, 5th May 2022 (when I wrote this blog). My classes are all now closed down. My heart broken and I feel like I don't have the right to be angry or disappointed. I don't have a life-threatening illness, nor am I ill. In pain yes but that too shall pass! I'm told.

What the future holds I do not know. What I do know is that I wanted, no needed to share this with you because 1. I felt I needed to let it all out. 2. To inspire you to do what you love every day and never take it for granted. Find your joy and don't put it off, don't think I'll do it tomorrow. Do it NOW!

Run, walk, cycle, eat the right things, sing, dance, go on the date, take the interview. Never stop moving your body and chasing your dreams whilst you can. Never stop playing with your loved ones and enjoying every minute of it because we don't know what the future holds.

What the future holds for Kerry Riley Wellness I don't know but I know it's not over.

Thank you to my amazing family for their support and my community of amazing empowering people.

Kerry x